Not long now: the blazing dream of my head is crawling out.

Shame I do feel. And I know there is something all wrong about me—believe me. Sometimes I shock myself.

Not from Hades' black and universal lake can you lift him. Not by groaning, not by prayers. Yet you run yourself out in a grief with no cure, no time-limit, no measure. It is a knot no one can untie. Why are you so in love with things unbearable?

By dread things I am compelled. I know that. I see the trap closing. I know what I am. But while life is in me I will not stop this violence. No. Oh my friends who is there to comfort me? Who understands? Leave me be, let me go, do not soothe me. This is a knot no one can untie. There will be no rest, there is no retrieval. No number exists for griefs like these.

Never since that time has this house got itself clear of rawblood butchery.

What an ugly, loveless life for a girl.

But death was a wind too strong for that.

I live in a place of tears.

You drive me back down my desperation—that unclouded incurable never forgotten evil growing inside my life.