I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

I saw a bank that said '24 Hour Banking,' but I didn’t have that much time.

So I got off the plane and I forget to take off my seat-belt and I’m dragging the plane through the terminal... The wings are knocking people over...

I just found out I have an IQ of 208, and I don't know what that means.

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?

I went down to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, 'Hey, the sign says you’re open 24 hours. He said, 'Yes, but not in a row.

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

A metaphor is like a simile.

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?