"Have you ever had a girlfriend, Kenji?""What?" He looks mortally offended. "Do I look like the kind of guy who's never had a girlfriend? Have you even met me?"

"Kenji snorts.“That’s because you’re not fragile,” Kenji says. “If anything, everyone needs to protect themselves from you. You’re like a freaking beast,” he says. Then adds, “I mean, you know—like, a cute beast. A little beast that tears shit up and breaks the earth and sucks the life out of people."

"Kenji has a hand pressed to his mouth, desperately trying to suppress a smile. He’s shaking his head, holding up a hand in apology. And then he breaks, laughing out loud, snorting as he tries to muffle the sound. “I’m sorry,” he says, pressing his lips together, shaking his head again. “This is not a funny moment. It’s not. I’m not laughing"

"Who says you can’t be cute and kick ass at the same time?” Kenji winks at me. “I do it every day."

"Shit, man, if I didn’t know you were in a world of pain right now, I’d be filming this."

"But — why would she break up with you? Why was she crying?” At this, I laugh again.“ Because I,” I say, pointing at myself, “am a monster."Kenji looks confused. “ And how is that news to anyone?”I smile. He’s funny, I think. Funny guy."

"You’re a total catch.” “I know, right? I keep trying to tell people."

"I cling to him, wishing I could ease his pain. I wish I could take his burdens and make them mine. "It's weird, isn't it?" he says. "What is?" "If we were naked right now, I'd be dead." "Shut up," I say, laughing against his chest. We're both wearing long sleeves, long pants. As long as my face and hand don't touch his skin, he's perfectly safe. "Well, it's true." "In what alternate universe would I ever be naked with you?" "I am just"

"I sigh. "I don't know what's happening to me.""They're called hormones."I shoot him a dirty look. "I'm serious.""Me too." He cocks his head at me. "That's like, biological and shit. Scientific. Maybe your lady bits are scientifically confused.""My lady bits?""Oh, I'm sorry" - Kenji pretends to look offended - "would you rather I use the proper anatomical terminology? Because you lady bits do not scare me-""Yeah, no thanks."

"Please—please get up—and lower your voice—”“Hell no.”“Why not?” I’m pleading now.“Because if I lower my voice, I won’t be able to hear myself speak. And that,” he says, “is my favorite part."