Without question the most unpopular medium of musical sound in the world.

We cannot expect you to be with us all the time, but perhaps you could be good enough to keep in touch now and again.

Movie music is noise. It's even more painful than my sciatica.

What can you do with it? It's like a lot of yaks jumping about.

The sound of a harpsichord - two skeletons copulating on a tin roof in a thunderstorm.

Madam, you have between your legs an instrument capable of giving pleasure to thousands and all you can do is scratch it.

Her singing reminds me of a cart coming downhill with the brake on.