What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

I'm going to give my psychoanalyst one more year, then I'm going to Lourdes

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.

He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.

I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

I am an only child. I have one sister.

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.