1,680 Quotes About Comedy

Good man and bad man with money goes a long ways." ~ Amunhotep El Bey

What's your name, son?' Sam said. The man looked to be about Sam's age, but Sam always thought calling people 'son' immediately gave the air of imperial authority and opened the door for spanking if need be.

An orgasm is an act of laughing through the genitals.

Roxy, stop being so obnoxious!" -Joy"I'm never obnoxious; I'm just concerned." -Roxy

And if you weren’t a fool, a common fool, a perfect fool, if you were an originalinstead of a translation … you see, Rodya, I recognise you’re a clever fellow, but you’re a fool!

In my experience women can balloon for no reason at all.

Following his rant littered with narcissism, she calmly responded, '...You have quite the little ego, don't you?' And with little thought, he then quickly retorted, 'What do you mean 'little'!?

Cashiers interact with hundreds of strangers per day, but seem to treat them all like one person. As a result, they seem to laugh at just about anything you say. “Hi, what can I get started for you?” “I’ll take a breakfast muffin.” “Haha, nice! Anything else?” “That’s everything.” “Haha, alright, there you go, sir. Your total is $3.24.” “Okay, here’s $5. Keep the change.” “Haha, no you’re good, haha.” If you want to feel like a stand-up comedian, buy something. 


It’s not great when your husband thinks the only guy who can talk to you, is some other guy.