286 Quotes About Funny-but-true

Religious nuts believe the 'others', that is you and I, are but dogs. That we infidels do not bow to their diotic god. What if one says the dog is one's god? And all must prostrate before it. Wouldn't one be mad to so insist? So too is a fellow who says another must bow to his god.

Respect? Of course, always, to all, because everything seems funnier when you're trying to show respect.

I am not sure if women are attracted to genius. Can you imagine the wise wizard winning the woman over the gallant swordsman? It seems rather otherworldly in more ways than one.

..."vers libre," (free verse) or nine-tenths of it, is not a new metre any more than sleeping in a ditch is a new school of architecture.

Flattery does not encourage the perfect flow of love in the vein of your relationship. Be genuine and speak out what you feel for each other without hiding the painful truth.

I treat my thoughts like an old person treats their valuables: I cannot for the life of me proceed to throwing them out.

Some things are so silly they have a certain brilliance to them. Other things, set as standards for brilliance and therefore exalted by many who don't know why, become tarnished because of it.

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you.

To be a philosopher, just reverse everything you have ever been told...and have a sense of humor doing it.