5,226 Quotes About Humour

Maxim 37: There is no "overkill." There is only "open fire" and "reload."-The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries

Don’t get me wrong, we’re not the fucking Partridge family or anything. We don’t all go on picnics and hold hands.

Hi. I'm here to enlist.You can't. You aren't human.You see, little fella, we don't do sociological stuff like "interspeciated workplaces." We're a crack company of space mercenaries. We do "hurting people" and "breaking things."Sounds like my kind of fun.-Schlock & Lieutenant Der Trihs

I have a bad habit of wolfing down things that catch my eye.

I love Prada. Not so much the clothes, which are for malnourished thirteen-year-olds, but I covet, with covety covetousness, the shoes and handbags. Like, I LOVE them. If I was given a choice between world peace and a Prada handbag, I'd dither. (I'm not proud of this, I'm only saying.)

So you're a fellow mercenary, then.""Does this mean you'll afford me some professional courtesy?""Don't ask for that. All it means is that you might get to face the person who kills you. . . But only if it's convenient.

Sex, whatever else it is, is an athletic skill. The more you practice, the more you can, the more you want to, the more you enjoy it, the less it tires you.

Maxim 6: If violence wasn't your last resort, you failed to resort to enough of it.-The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries

We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.Cross it? I'm making plans to destroy the bridge from orbit.-Colonel Ceeta & Captain Tagon