374 Quotes About Humourous

See that?" said Lemon. "The car tracks turn off there.""How do you know it's not the parks people on a golf cart thingie?""You don't golf, do you, Kate?""No, I'm too young to die of boredom.

Lawyers, I suppose were once children.

The camp fell silent, each group staring tensely at the other. Finally Marcus stepped forward. ''If you insist on going through me to get to him, it's your call. But I warn you, I will probably cry when you hurt me, and you'll feel bad about it later.'' Vinci looked at him. ''That's your defiant speech?'' ''Get used to it,'' said Marcus.''There's a lot more useless heroics where that came from.

A turd placed in the snow will become hard and significantly less odorous than its warm weather counterpart. This doesn’t mean that it has ceased to be a turd.

So Septimus will be the eighty-second Lord of Stormhold," said Tertius."There is a proverbial saying chiefly concerned with warning against too closely calculating the numerical value of unhatched chicks," pointed out Quintus.

So what's the problem?’‘No problem. There's no problem. Don't ever say what's the problem, nthat's the negative way of looking at things, you know like is the bottle half empty or half full, know what I mean, every problem is also an opportunity, the question here is what opportunity does this present us with?’‘It seems to me’, said Ernest stubbornly, ‘that this opportunity presents us with a problem. Is there a director that Virginia would like?

We spend the first twelve months of our children's' lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.

I have seen many a face that was more good-looking — never one that looked half so good.

Winder's mind felt even fuzzier than it had done over the past few years, but he was certain about cake. He'd been eating cake, and now there wasn't any. Through the mists he saw it, apparently close but, when he tried to reach it, a long way away. A certain realization dawned on him."Oh," he said.YES, said Death."Not even time to finish my cake?"NO. THERE IS NO MORE TIME, EVEN FOR CAKE. FOR YOU, THE CAKE IS OVER. YOU HAVE REACHED THE END OF CAKE.