374 Quotes About Humourous

I thought dwarfs loved gold," said Angua."They just say that to get it into bed.

It was funny how people were people everywhere you went, even if the people concerned weren't the people the people who made up the phrase "people are people everywhere" had traditionally thought of as people.

We try to make guests feel welcome," said Dee, scuttling behind his desk. He pulled off his pointed hat and, to Vimes's amazement, put on a pair of thick smoked glasses."You had papers?" he said. Vimes handed them over."It says here "His Grace"," the dwarf said, after reading them for awhile."Yes, that's me.""And there's a sir.""That's me, too.""And an excellency.""'fraid so." Vimes narrowed his eyes. "I was blackboard monitor for awhile, too.

Colon looked awkward, as if the bunched underwear of the past was tangling itself in the crotch of recollection.

The plain old Sam Vimes had fought back. He got rid of most of the plumes and the stupid tights, and ended up with a dress uniform that at least looked as though its owner was male. But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armourers had made a new, gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armour. It was gilt by association.

You're not suggesting that Vetinari tucks into a nice rat every day?" said Angua."I've heard he uses rats as spies, so I don't think he'd use them as elevenses," said Carrot.

Vimes awoke with a noseful of camel. There are far worse awakenings, but not as many as you might think.

You haven't heard of him? And he is a D'reg!" Mrs Goriff pulled at her husband's arm."D'reg?" said Angua."A warlike desert tribe," said Carrot. "Very fierce. Honourable, though. They say that if a D'reg is your friend he's your friend for life.""And if he's not your friend?""That's about five seconds.

Silk stockings. With garters. Well, they were out. There were a lot of things he'd do for Sybil, but if garters figured anywhere in the relationship they weren't going to be on him.