66 Quotes About Marriage-humor

Only about 3 percent of animal species are monogamous. A couple of penguins, some otters and a few other oddball critters. To these select few it comes natural to mate for life and never look at another member of the opposite sex. Humans are not part of that little club. Like the other 97% of species, humans are not monogamous by nature. We just pretend that we are.

To see a man’s true colours, tell him that you don’t plan on having sex with him. To see a woman’s true colours, tell her that you don’t plan on marrying her.

The groom should not see you in the dress just before the wedding, that’s bad luck. You know what’s worst luck? Is getting married, itself. I’ve read studies. It’s like 2 out of 3 of those end in divorce, sometimes more. 3 out of 2, some.

Marriage is a necessary evil

It had been a beautiful night and she loved him more than ever in the morning. "If it weren't real love," David told her, "if it were only physical, it wouldn't be that way."Claudia, who was only eighteen and who did not know very much about love, had the greatest respect for her husband's superior knowledge of sex. Not that he'd ever led a wild life, or run around, but he'd read a great many books on the subject and knew as much as a doctor.

People who say they do not regret anything in their life, for the next birth too should get the very same wife.

Chorus of old men: How true the saying: 'Tis impossible to live with the baggages, impossible to live without 'em.

He never quarreled with his wife, but he never talked to her;--he never had time to talk, he was so taken up with speaking.

I like my mimosas like I like my men...transparent.