35 Quotes About Wurms

Sometimes I wake up and wonder if those chalk outlines they have at murder scenes get together for holiday parties...

I'm not sure if it's possible, but if it is I have a life contract with a rubber glove clause. This means almost any social interaction will involve the placing on, or removal of rubber gloves. That 'snap' means the fun, whatever type it may be, has begun.Doctors? OK, dentists? OK, clerk at Walmart? WHAT!!The Clerk begins to pull on the gloves as other shoppers suddenly find other open lanes.**SNAP**!

Never torque a man's nuts unless you are his mechanic!!

One of the joys of being a grandparent is giving your grandchild caffeinated sugary drinks late in the day, and sending them home. Do you have any idea how many years I had to wait for that?

You know what they say. "One man's joke is another man's brother

I flunked out of mime school. I could never hear what the instructor was saying!!!

If I were a candy bar I’d want to be a snicker, because then I’d have the last laugh!!

Remember, never apply too much torque or you'll bust your nuts!!

Headstones:What I asked was, "Would you MARRY me?!!""This time I'll count to one hundred and you hide.""OK, It's not funny anymore let me out!!