[{"data":1,"prerenderedAt":-1},["ShallowReactive",2],{"$faBdSIj0fJjBbtsIx2tH07GBLpujespGOUBQtoLLxlVQ":3,"$fUATNESRcu2vGVtwuV6OwGCfMcvx-dvK4LqS1xvvNPh0":12},{"author":4,"tags":11},{"author_id":5,"author_name":6,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"bio":9,"short_bio":9,"bio_jsonld":9,"slug":10,"image_url":9},27106,"Franklin Veaux","F",32,null,"franklin-veaux",[],{"quotes":13,"pagination":78},[14,22,29,35,41,47,53,60,66,72],{"id":15,"quote_text":16,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":19,"source":20,"quote_tag":21,"commentary":9},3031573,"Practicing security means continually turning toward the best version of yourself. Each belief about yourself that you choose to hold onto, in each moment, is a step toward or away from the person you want to be. As Canadian entrepreneur Lynn Robinson says, “Our beliefs about ourselves are all made up. So it’s a good idea to make up some good ones.",6,false,{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":23,"quote_text":24,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":25,"source":26,"quote_tag":27,"commentary":28},3031572,"We propose a different metric for the success of a relationship. Relationships that make us the best versions of ourselves are successes.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],"**The Backstory**\nThis quote is likely from Franklin Veaux's book \"Tying the Knot: A Guide to Polyamory,\" co-authored with Eve Rickert, published in 2015. At that time, Veaux was reflecting on his own experiences navigating complex relationships and questioning traditional notions of relationship success.\n\n**The Hidden Insight**\nThe counter-intuitive truth in this quote is not about focusing solely on the other person's growth or happiness, but rather how one's own personal growth and self-improvement are influenced by the dynamics within a relationship. The author is highlighting that what we traditionally view as \"good\" relationships - those where both partners are equally happy and fulfilled - might not be the most conducive to individual development.\n\n**How to Use This**\nTo apply this insight, consider prioritizing relationships that challenge you to grow, learn, and become a better version of yourself. Instead of seeking harmony at all costs, be open to relationships where conflicts and disagreements can serve as catalysts for your personal evolution.",{"id":30,"quote_text":31,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":32,"source":33,"quote_tag":34,"commentary":9},3031570,"Your partner is a person, and people can’t be stolen. If some new shiny tries to “steal” him, he has to consent to being stolen. Veto or no veto, if he wants to stay with you, he will. So.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":36,"quote_text":37,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":38,"source":39,"quote_tag":40,"commentary":9},3031567,"There’s nothing wrong with asking your partner to take time to show you why you’re valued.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":42,"quote_text":43,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":44,"source":45,"quote_tag":46,"commentary":9},3031565,"A willingness to question yourself, to challenge yourself, and to explore without fear the hidden parts of you are the best tools to gain that self-knowledge.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":48,"quote_text":49,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":50,"source":51,"quote_tag":52,"commentary":9},3031562,"The agreements that work most consistently are those that are rooted in compassion, encourage mutual respect and empowerment, leave it to our partners’ judgment how to implement them, and have input from – and apply equally to – everyone affected by them. T.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":54,"quote_text":55,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":56,"source":57,"quote_tag":58,"commentary":59},3031558,"When we make ourselves vulnerable to others, we do more than show them how we value their friendship. We show that we trust them and are willing to be seen by them. We choose to let them show us the best of themselves.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],"**The Backstory**\n\nFranklin Veaux, a polyamorous relationship expert and writer, penned these words in his book \"More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory\" (2016). At the time, he was reflecting on the complexities of relationships and the importance of vulnerability. As someone who had experienced the benefits and challenges of non-monogamous relationships firsthand, Veaux's work aimed to provide a nuanced understanding of love and connection.\n\n**The Hidden Insight**\n\nWhat lies beneath this quote is the counter-intuitive idea that vulnerability is not just about opening ourselves up to others; it's also about trusting them to reciprocate with their own vulnerability. By being willing to be seen by someone, we're acknowledging that they have the capacity to see us in return – a dynamic that requires both parties to engage with equal openness.\n\n**How to Use This**\n\nTo apply this mindset today, consider prioritizing relationships where you feel secure enough to let your partner(s) show you their most authentic selves. By doing so, you'll create a space for mutual vulnerability and trust-building, ultimately strengthening the bond between you and fostering deeper connections.",{"id":61,"quote_text":62,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":63,"source":64,"quote_tag":65,"commentary":9},3031553,"Things will go wrong. You and your partners will make mistakes. People will get hurt. To paraphrase Voltaire, we are all born of frailty and error. What happens afterward depends on how capable we are to forgive one another for our errors, handle the consequences with grace and dignity, and learn from our mistakes.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":67,"quote_text":68,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":69,"source":70,"quote_tag":71,"commentary":9},3031549,"A sense of worth is critical to counteracting the scarcity model of love and life. If we do not believe in our worth, we become disempowered, unable to advocate for our needs. We do not see or embrace the love that is actually around us in our lives.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":73,"quote_text":74,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":75,"source":76,"quote_tag":77,"commentary":9},3031546,"The most immediate is that if you tell your partner “It’s okay to ask for anything you want,” it better be true. If you’re not prepared to make it safe for your partner to open up to you, he won’t. Because he’ll feel he can’t.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"currentPage":79,"totalPages":80,"totalItems":8,"itemsPerPage":81},1,4,10]