[{"data":1,"prerenderedAt":-1},["ShallowReactive",2],{"$ffRpU2xSbNd6ib9Sy3n5UA5nVvKZ6oUBAItyAe8otZVk":3,"$fT3ek9KSotsh8Om396QBKjEq38FB260AaOzW90kq608c":12},{"author":4,"tags":11},{"author_id":5,"author_name":6,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"bio":9,"short_bio":9,"slug":10,"image_url":9},3548,"Jan Ellison","J",7,null,"jan-ellison",[],{"quotes":13,"pagination":97},[14,22,33,44,55,71,87],{"id":15,"quote_text":16,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":19,"source":20,"quote_tag":21,"commentary":9},874707,"Stories don't like to end when you want them to, do they? Loose ends aren't easy to snip with scissors or tuck inside a hem. They tempt you. They want you to keep pulling until there is nothing left to keep you warm.",2,false,{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":23,"quote_text":24,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":25,"source":26,"quote_tag":27,"commentary":9},699603,"It was possible to rush forward, looking back, and break your neck.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[28],{"id":29,"tag":30},3461892,{"id":31,"tag_name":32},11443,"the-past",{"id":34,"quote_text":35,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":36,"source":37,"quote_tag":38,"commentary":9},665148,"It's not always wise to assume that just because the surface of the world appears undisturbed, life is where you left it.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[39],{"id":40,"tag":41},3367013,{"id":42,"tag_name":43},7351,"philosophical",{"id":45,"quote_text":46,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":47,"source":48,"quote_tag":49,"commentary":9},563807,"Not a day or an hour and sometimes not even a moment in advance did I have any idea what Patrick had in mind for me, or whether he had me in mind at all. This uncertainty lay like a sore under the surface of my skin, erupting again and again, then subsiding, but never healing.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[50],{"id":51,"tag":52},3034571,{"id":53,"tag_name":54},3014,"unrequited-love",{"id":56,"quote_text":57,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":58,"source":59,"quote_tag":60,"commentary":9},526887,"He had a strange way of talking, his head tucked into his neck and his eyes fixed in the empty space beyond, as if something were suspended there, ripe fruit or a glimmer of light, as if he were not quite brave enough, or perhaps too polite, to look a person in the eye.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[61,66],{"id":62,"tag":63},2898132,{"id":64,"tag_name":65},2515,"descriptions",{"id":67,"tag":68},2898133,{"id":69,"tag_name":70},23797,"eye-contact",{"id":72,"quote_text":73,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":74,"source":75,"quote_tag":76,"commentary":9},115387,"People say a mother is only as happy as her least happy child. But what if the state of that child's happiness has become a mystery? What if that child is no longer a child but a young man who has removed himself to a great distance and encased himself in silence?",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[77,82],{"id":78,"tag":79},774864,{"id":80,"tag_name":81},99,"parenting",{"id":83,"tag":84},774863,{"id":85,"tag_name":86},763,"mothers",{"id":88,"quote_text":89,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":90,"source":91,"quote_tag":92,"commentary":9},10200,"We are only flesh and blood. We are only chemicals mixing and circuits firing, sometimes in disarray. We are, every last one of us, plagued by useless want.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[93],{"id":94,"tag":95},74298,{"id":8,"tag_name":96},"want",{"currentPage":98,"totalPages":98,"totalItems":8,"itemsPerPage":99},1,10]