[{"data":1,"prerenderedAt":-1},["ShallowReactive",2],{"$fI6zLOVPqSQGt5X2EPJopfOHgWs3SebpwE6exq6qsNqQ":3,"$f7yaV2keyfquLpdVmQQTzKp9WFvOYYqt99SkS88pkwVA":12},{"author":4,"tags":11},{"author_id":5,"author_name":6,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"bio":9,"short_bio":9,"slug":10,"image_url":9},10306,"Leslie Vernick","L",29,null,"leslie-vernick",[],{"quotes":13,"pagination":78},[14,23,30,36,42,48,54,60,66,72],{"id":15,"quote_text":16,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":19,"source":20,"quote_tag":21,"commentary":22},3223634,"Indifference says you are not a person to love, but an object to use.",6,false,{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],"**The Backstory**\nLeslie Vernick, a renowned expert on emotional abuse and trauma, penned these poignant words. Although I couldn't pinpoint an exact source, it's likely from one of her self-help books or online resources where she shares personal anecdotes and philosophical reflections. As a historian, I note that Leslie Vernick has been open about her own experiences with emotional abuse and her journey towards healing.\n\n**The Hidden Insight**\nAt first glance, the quote appears to be a straightforward condemnation of objectification. However, it also contains a subtle yet profound critique of the human tendency to conflate love with utility. The author is saying that when we reduce someone to an \"object\" (read: a means to our own ends), it's not just a matter of objectifying them – it's also a sign that we don't truly see their humanity.\n\n**How to Use This**\nTo apply this mindset today, acknowledge the difference between loving and using someone. Before you decide to help or support another person, take a moment to reflect on your motivations: are they driven by genuine care for their well-being, or do you stand to gain something from the relationship? Be honest with yourself – if it's the latter, re-evaluate how you're interacting with this person and consider whether it's time to establish clearer boundaries.",{"id":24,"quote_text":25,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":26,"source":27,"quote_tag":28,"commentary":29},3223633,"From Christ’s perspective, success isn’t measured by how much we do, how much we earn, or how much we have, but by how well we love and what kind of person we’re becoming in the midst of life’s activities.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],"**The Backstory**\n\nLeslie Vernick, a Christian author and counselor, likely penned this quote in one of her books or devotionals. As she navigates the complexities of faith and personal growth, she draws from her experiences as a therapist and her deep understanding of scripture. This quote reflects her emphasis on spiritual transformation over external achievements.\n\n**The Hidden Insight**\n\nWhat lies beneath the surface is not just a redefinition of success but a challenge to the pervasive cultural narrative that equates worth with productivity. The hidden insight here is that our value, both in God's eyes and our own, is not contingent upon what we accomplish or achieve but on how we love and grow as individuals.\n\n**How to Use This**\n\nTo apply this mindset today, one can begin by regularly assessing their motivations and priorities: are they driven by a desire to please others or to deepen their relationship with Christ? By recognizing that our true worth is not tied to external markers of success, we can cultivate a more authentic sense of self-worth and pursue spiritual growth with greater intentionality.",{"id":31,"quote_text":32,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":33,"source":34,"quote_tag":35,"commentary":9},3223630,"Many of us, like Sandra, are under the impression “that if we don’t feel something there can be no authenticity in doing it. But the wisdom of God says something different, namely, that we can act ourselves into a new way of feeling much quicker than we can feel ourselves into a new way of acting.”5 Choosing to act right when you don’t feel like it isn’t hypocrisy; it’s obedience.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":37,"quote_text":38,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":39,"source":40,"quote_tag":41,"commentary":9},3223623,"Is biblical headship synonymous with taking control over someone else and forcing her to comply when she resists? And, does biblical submission require a wife to always do what her husband says? Does it mean she has no choices of her own or can’t ever say no without being labeled as rebellious or ungodly?",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":43,"quote_text":44,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":45,"source":46,"quote_tag":47,"commentary":9},3223620,"Dear God, This is so scary, but it’s also freeing. For the first time I see your plan for healing broken relationships. I need to do the right thing, and it’s not to close my eyes and stay silent. It’s to confront him. But I need your help. I’m afraid it won’t go well and I will have to implement a consequence. Help me be strong.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":49,"quote_text":50,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":51,"source":52,"quote_tag":53,"commentary":9},3223616,"Maybe you think that God is more interested in preserving your marriage than the well-being of you and your children, but that is not true.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":55,"quote_text":56,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":57,"source":58,"quote_tag":59,"commentary":9},3223612,"He needs a wife who will love him enough to tell him the truth and to respectfully challenge his selfishness, his self-absorption, and his self-deception.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":61,"quote_text":62,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":63,"source":64,"quote_tag":65,"commentary":9},3223606,"Instead of hungering after God, we’ve feasted at the table of cheap substitutes. No wonder we are left still hungry and longing for more.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":67,"quote_text":68,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":69,"source":70,"quote_tag":71,"commentary":9},3223602,"Marriage and family are important to God, but just as important to him are the individuals within those marriages and families.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"id":73,"quote_text":74,"author_id":5,"source_id":17,"has_image":18,"author":75,"source":76,"quote_tag":77,"commentary":9},3223598,"Emotional abuse systematically degrades, diminishes, and can eventually destroy the personhood of the abused.",{"id":5,"author_name":6,"slug":10,"author_name_first_letter":7,"article_count":8,"image_url":9},{},[],{"currentPage":79,"totalPages":80,"totalItems":8,"itemsPerPage":81},1,3,10]