Real forgiveness in close relationships is never easy. It can’t be rushed or engineered.

There are an incalculable—even infinite—number of situations in which we can practice forgiveness. Expecting it to be a singular action—motivated by the sheer imperative to move on and forget—can be more damaging than the original feelings of anger. Accepting forgiveness as pluralistic and as an ongoing, individualized process opens us up to realize the role that our own needs play in conflict resolution.

There’s no denying that it takes effort to set the intention to see our fundamental connected-ness with others.

If we truly loved ourselves, we’d never harm another. That is a truly revolutionary, celebratory mode of self-care.

Cultivation of positive emotions, including self-love and self-respect, strengthens our inner resources and opens us to a broader range of thoughts and actions.

A key barometer to help us weigh the rightness of our actions is self-respect.

The skills available to us through mindfulness make it possible to bring love to our connections with others.

When our focus is on seeking, perfecting, or clinging to romance, the charge is often generated by instability, rather than by an authentic connection with another person.

No connection is always easy or free of strife, no matter how many minutes a day we meditate. It’s how we relate to conflict, as well as to our differing needs and expectations, that makes our relationships sustainable.