34 Quotes by Alan Simpson

Those who travel the high road of humility are not troubled by heavy traffic.

We have two political parties in this country, the Stupid Party and the Evil Party. I belong to the Stupid Party.

There is no ‘slippery slope’ toward loss of liberty, only a long staircase where each step down must first be tolerated by the American people and their leaders.

People tend to stay at home and eat a home-cooked meal. There are three days that are really slow for restaurants – Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter.

In your country club, your church, and business, about fifteen percent of the people are screwballs, lightweights, and boobs, and you would not want those people unrepresented in Congress.

Any education that matters is liberal. All the saving truths, all the healing graces that distinguish a good education from a bad one or a full education from a half empty one are contained in that word.

He’s a million rubber bands in his resilience.

It doesn’t matter is you call it ‘Obama-care’ or ‘Elvis Presley care’ or ‘I-don’t-care care.’ It cannot sustain itself in its present form.

An educated man is thoroughly inoculated against humbug, thinks for himself and tries to give his thoughts, in speech or on paper, some style.