44 Quotes by Alexander Woollcott

I count it a high honor to belong to a profession in which the good men write every paragraph, every sentence, every line, as lovingly as any Addison or Steele, and do so in full regard that by tomorrow it will have been burned, or used, if at all, to line a shelf.

Today just might be the best day to start seriously thinking about quitting smoking...

She was like a sinking ship firing on the rescuers.

A broker is a man who runs your fortune into a shoestring.

One listens to one's lawyer prattle on as long as one can stand it and then signs where indicated.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with Oscar Levant that a miracle can't fix.

To all things clergic I am allergic.

Reading Proust is like bathing in someone else's dirty water.

The scenery in the play was beautiful, but the actors got in front of it.