1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

Road, n. A strip of land along which one may pass from where it is too tiresome to be to where it is futile to go.

Backbite: To ''speak of a man as you find him'' when he can't find you.

Appetite, n. An instinct thoughtfully implanted by Providence as a solution to the labor question.

POSITIVISM- A philosophy that denies our knowledge of the Real and affirms our ignorance of the Apparent. Its longest exponent is Comte, its broadest Mill and its thickest Spencer.

Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property subject to private ownership and control is the foundation of modern society, and is eminently worthy of the superstructure.

A penny saved is a penny to squander.

PYRRHONISM- An ancient philosophy, named for its inventor. It consisted of an absolute disbelief in everything but Pyrrhonism. Its modern professors have added that.

Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

PESSIMISM- philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile.