1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

In many instances nothing marked the spot where lay the vestiges of some poor mortal-who, leaving "a large circle of sorrowing friends," had been left by them in turn-except a depression in the earth, more lasting than that in the spirits of the mourners.

Observatory n, A place where astronomers conjecture away the guesses of their predecessors.

God hates a coward...

Rome has seven sacraments, but the Protestant churches, being less prosperous, feel that they can afford only two, and these of inferior sanctity.

EAT, v.i. To perform successively (and successfully) the functions of mastication, humectation, and deglutition. 'I was in the drawing-room, enjoying my dinner,' said Brillat-Savarin, beginning an anecdote. 'What!' interrupted Rochebriant; 'eating dinner in a drawing-room?' 'I must beg you to observe, monsieur,' explained the great gastronome, 'that I did not say I was eating my dinner, but enjoying it. I had dined an hour before.'

A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced.

OBSTINATE, adj. Inaccessible to the truth as it is manifest in the splendor and stress of our advocacy.

Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.

PHOTOGRAPH, n. A picture painted by the sun without instruction in art. It is a little better than the work of an Apache, but not quite so good as that of a Cheyenne.