1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.

The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.

Prejudice - a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.

SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment. A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has only nine hundred and ninety-nine. For every sauce invented and accepted a vice is renounced and forgiven.

The sum of religion, says Pythagoras, is to be like him thou worshipest. Had Pythagoras lived in our day he would have seen his mistake. The sum of modern religion is to make him thou worshipest like unto thyself.

RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.

Happiness has not to all the same name: to Youth she is known as the Future; Age knows her as the Dream.

DELUSION, n. The father of a most respectable family, comprising Enthusiasm, Affection, Self-denial, Faith, Hope, Charity and many other goodly sons and daughters.

Happiness is lost by criticizing it; sorrow by accepting it.