3 Quotes by Bratniss Everclean

They were way more interested in learning the alphabet or whatever than they were in learning how to rip a moose in half with their bare hands. Then make a helmet out of its skull. Then to use that helmet to help kill more moose. Collect the skull helmets. Combine. Assemble. Super moose skull helmet. Infinite power.

He’s crying so hard now that he’s getting that fat kid in a white t-shirt at a pool look.

We’re talking your wife for an eggshell; that brand of jerk.