190 Quotes by Carl Hiaasen

Unfortunately, I don’t get to read nearly as much as I want because I’m always working on my own stuff, either the novels or newspaper columns.

For now, there’s nothing to do but strap on an attitude and act like I’m having a ball.

It’s easy to get distracted by the vaudevillian aspects of the healthcare debate.

After the first gunshot, they dove to the ground and pressed themselves flat. Then came two other shots, followed shortly by more. Nick was sure he heard one of the bullets zing off a nearby tree.

I think in the old days, the nexus of weirdness ran through Southern California, and to a degree New York City. I think it’s changed so that every bizarre story in the country now has a Florida connection. I don’t know why, except it must be some inversion of magnetic poles or something.

I don’t have an e-reader. One reason is that I like to dog-ear the page when I find a particularly good sentence or passage.

I’ve always enjoyed making people laugh. But in order for me to be funny, I have to get ticked off about something.

I'd always wanted to write books ever since I was a kid.

There's so much hate that we direct externally that we forget we have our own psychos. But that's the role of the satirist - you have to examine your own country and say, 'look!'