90 Quotes by Colin Mochrie

Give me liberty or give me a bran muffin!

The Beatles, Rolling Stones, Barbra Streisand, Bruce Springsteen, these are just some of the people who threatened to sue if we used their songs.

I'm a traveling practical joker. That's my line of work.

As a kid I watched television 24 hours a day and loved every minute of it. The two shows that always make me laugh and are therefore my favourites are The Dick Van Dyke Show and Fawlty Towers.

When I'm on stage, it's a little world I've created where I'm sort of the thing, so I have total control over everything that happens. When we're improvising, I'm with someone I totally trust. I know things are going to work out. I don't have those guarantees in life. There are no consequences on stage.

I'm quite shy. Really. I'm trying to expand myself as a person more, get involved with people.

My agent, Jeff Andrews, suggested I write a book. For some reason. he doesn't like it when I'm not doing anything.

Last time I saw him he tried to murder me. But when you're trying to kill someone by chopping their head off, rolling them up in a carpet and lighting it on fire, you better make sure they're dead!

Judy Garland would gain and lose a lot of weight, and because of that, she ended up having no derriere, so she had to have a prosthetic one to give her shape in some of her evening gowns. Because we're working on a Canadian show and they're very cheap, they wanted to take my wife's prosthetic (butt) away. That was the whole pilot. The great thing about a Canadian show is we have a little more freedom, I think.