20 Quotes by David Eschenlohr

It was all fine until the girls started drinking. (Everything is always fine up until that point.)

Even though I approached girls relentlessly, I wasn't really approachable myself.

While aloofness might fascinate others and makes them respect you, it will never allow for intimacy and profound relationships.

I’ve always had a bit of a feminine aura, but I don’t mind. Russell Brand has one, too.

Be patient and be yourself. Unbelievable that I needed to consume weeks worth of books and seminars to learn that.

Obnoxiousness had covered up my insecurities.

My dick’s wisdom impeded my ability to have meaningless intercourse.

He had to witness how a ginger German with a v-neck that almost went as low as his navel drew all the attention to himself.

I, a half naked German, was about to be discovered by her cruel Viking dad in his own bedroom, having smudged his daughter just hours ago. Full of gratitude I contemplated that I would at least not die a virgin.