8 Quotes by David Sosnowski

The whole notion of pet having was irrational after all. Why on earth would you attach yourself to something biologically predetermined to die before you? It was crazy. Becoming attached just guaranteed a painful amputation somewhere down the road, and there you’d be, this phantom limb in your head – this active absence – following you around, only to disappear whenever you turned around to look at it. Pets – and the acquiring thereof – was just a setup for gratuitous grief.

To say she was bitter fell a wee bit short, like calling sulfuric acid tangy.

Where she was going, she had no idea. But the fact that she could still walk suggested she should. And so she did.

Dev wondered if that was the job of fiction, to test-drive the impossible, to loosen our grip on conventional reality. He guessed that’s probably what fiction writers would claim – if there were any left, that is.

You don’t think Babyhands pressed a button he shouldn’t have, do you?

They straddled the line between feral and civilized, licking the hand that fed them and attacking whatever it pointed to.

Most seemed to have been prepping for the Obama apocalypse, the one with FEMA storm trooping in, black helicopters dispatched by the first black president, come to seize their guns, hustling them off to camps where they’d be forced to read the Koran, eat kale, who knew what, while they waited to be dragged before death panels.

Disagreeing has become an easy way to feel better about yourself for being smarter than everybody else. I call it the assholier-than-thou syndrome.