146 Quotes by David Spade

I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her.

When I started I'd fly across the country to do a gig for a hundred bucks.

It's the old college days kind of thing.

I'm just doing the show for a while, might do another 'Joe Dirt' movie in the summer. That's about it. The show is really starting and that's what I have to do, like my day-to-day job.

I like to think it's because I'm a cool guy, but maybe they just don't want to be made fun of.

You catch all the '80s hits without any of 'the stuff from the new album,'

The hard part about SNL is, there’s no real communication when you get there. It’s not like people are mean to you, they just act like you’re not there.

I want to get away from it all. Move to the sticks. Montana. Hundreds of miles from civilization. Get a cabin in the snow. Curl up with some cute girl. Say stuff to her like, Scream all you want, sugar. Ain’t nobody gonna hear you!

I’ve had it where things didn’t go well for me with movies or something that got canceled.