393 Quotes by Dennis Miller

America may be the best country in the world, but that's kind of like being the valedictorian of summer school.

Ray Lewis knifed through those offensive linemen like a sucker-punch switchblade slicing between the ribs of some inebriated trash-talking punk outside a sports bar.

I've grown fonder for Hillary Clinton since she ran for the presidency. I think that it's emblematic of the Rolling Stones song, you can't always get what you want, i.e., the grail. Sometimes you get what you need. And whatever she's gotten over the last couple of years, being humbled or be it being humbled and see the proletariat come to bat for her, getting outside of the bubble, getting out of this man's shadow, not quite getting the job she wants but a great wonk job.

I've seen better coverage at an Alan Keyes press conference.

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R's only one begins with an R.

Companionate Conservatism - Making the streets safer before people are kicked out onto them.

Somebody call Janet Reno - I think I just saw Donato dragging Doug Flutie into a locker room closet!

The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt.

Twitter! Never have lives been less lived and more chronicled!