318 Quotes by Dylan Moran

You cannot over estimate how infantile men are about sex! Men are people that have sex BECAUSE they have a headache... or are on fire, or have been shot in the head, or whatever it is!

I thought The Office was good, though I didn't think of it as a sitcom, just as a very good programme.

Shame is one of the greatest aphrodisiacs in the world, anyway, built into religion.

Lots of comics try stuff out all year round, which is very sensible - I don't.

The sensible thing for everyone to do would be to write all their op-eds and think pieces now so they're ready the day after the election when [Donald] Trump is no longer in the picture. God, I can't wait for that. I hope he just goes away.

Paper acts as an eraser on the mind, as soon as you look at what you've written.

It's such a bullshit move. Transparently so. It's obviously supposed to give succor to people who feel pissed off because someone from another country got a job that they feel should've been given to them. But that's what people voted against here. They voted against the movement of labor - that kind of fluidity - because they want a Britain that no longer exists, and they can't get it.

Yeah, I think Michael has had to deal with that label of being Michael Caine for a long time.

Women are like canoes, full of soup. At first everyone is suspicious but then everyone wants one.