178 Quotes by Elaine Stritch

if somebody doesn't have any talent, get off the stage! you're wasting my time.

All you have to do is say, 'I'm going home,' and you're the most popular girl at the party.

The closer a part is to you, the harder it is to play. Anything else is just imitation. If I'm playing a Russian countess, I get the hat, the accent, the outrageousness. Easy. Playing a murderess? Perfect.

I can't explain chemistry. I really can't. I haven't got a clue what it's all about. It just happens. It's like falling in love. You can't explain why you fall in love or explain why it's this particular person.

You have to be very, very good looking to get ahead in motion pictures.

My idea of serenity - that wonderful word that everybody's trying to get into their life - is call-waiting.

I have not had any of that surgical stuff. I am too curious to find out exactly how I progress every day of my life naturally. That is what fascinates me.

You cannot tell an audience a lie. They know it before you do; before it's out of your mouth, they know it's a lie.

Let me tell you about those convents. All that crap about extending the pinkie finger while sipping tea is a myth. Convent schools are breeding grounds for great broads and occasionally one-of-the-boys. Convent schools teach you to play against everything, which is what I'm still doing.