753 Quotes by Evan Esar

If you can’t bear to have your face stepped on, don’t try to climb the ladder of success.

The car was invented as a convenient place to sit out traffic jams.

Walking isn’t a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage.

You can always make a loan at a bank if you can show sufficient evidence that you don’t need it.

With a braggart, it’s no sooner done than said.

The honeymoon is the only period when a woman isn’t trying to reform her husband.

You can always tell the golfer who’s winning: he’s the one who keeps telling his opponent that it’s only a game.

Compare what you want with what you have, and you’ll be unhappy; compare what you deserve with what you have, and you’ll be happy.

Everything comes to him who waits – if he waits till it comes.