753 Quotes by Evan Esar

A gentleman farmer never dirties himself with the soil or soils himself with the dirt.

The only bright thing about some movies is the electric sign in front of the theater.

You can always tell an eight-year-old, but you have to tell him twice.

It's not easy for a beautiful girl to believe that love is blind.

Some men flee from temptation, but others just crawl away from it hope it will overtake them.

Of all daylight-saving plans, the best by far is an alarm clock.

The best place to have a com is on the bottom of your foot: nobody can step on it but you.

The cure love is marriage, and the cure for marriage is love again.

The rainy days for which a man saves usually arrive during his vacation.