111 Quotes by H.L. Mencken

Democracy is the worship of jackals by jackasses.

How far the gentlemen of dark complexion will get with their independence, now that they have declared it, I don’t know. There are serious difficulties in their way. The vast majority of people of their race are but two or three inches removed from gorillas: it will be a sheer impossibility, for a long, long while, to interest them in anything above pork-chops and bootleg gin.

Public opinion, in its raw state, gushes out in the immemorial form of the mob's fear. It is piped into central factories, and there it is flavored and colored, and put into cans.

In all ages there arise protests from tender men against the bitterness of criticism, especially social criticism. They are the same men who, when they come down with malaria, patronize a doctor who prescribes, not quinine, but marshmallows.

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him.

A diferença entre o sexo pago e o sexo grátis é que o sexo pago costuma sair mais barato.

Injustice is relatively easy to bear; it is justice that hurts.

Penetrating so many secrets, we cease to believe in the Unknown. But there it sits, nevertheless, calmly licking its chops.

Bachelors know more about women than married men. If they didn't, they'd be married, too.