20 Quotes by Hank Moody

You know why love stories have happy endings?” I shake my head.“Because they end too early,” she continues. “They always end right at the kiss. You never have to see all the bullshit that comes later. You know, Life.

The groom should not see you in the dress just before the wedding, that’s bad luck. You know what’s worst luck? Is getting married, itself. I’ve read studies. It’s like 2 out of 3 of those end in divorce, sometimes more. 3 out of 2, some.

When it comes to emotions, women know how to paint with the full set of oils, while men are busy doodling with crayons.

She said one thing and I said another and the next thing I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation.

Get it in while you can. It'll all be gone soon enough.

I can’t teach you how to write, and anybody who says they can is full of shit.

I google myself but I never cheated on you. Never.

That was not sex. That was naked poetry.

Once upon a time, I wrote a book. People seemed to dig it, so I wrote another and one after that. That’s when Hollywood came knocking at my back door. As soon as I cashed that check, I wrapped my lips around the mighty erection that is the film industry and sucked hard, just like a good whore should. Unfortunately, I had to be taught not to orphan the balls.