72 Quotes by Heywood Broun

I might resume the habit of going to church if the preacher would be honest enough to stand up some morning and say, "Perhaps next Sunday, but not today," and then sit down

Everybody favors free speech in the slack moments when no axes are being ground

Except that right side up is best, there is not much to learn about holding a baby. There are one hundred and fifty-two distinctly different ways --and all are right! At least all will do.

The most prolific period of pessimism comes at twenty-one or thereabouts, when the first attempt is made to translate dreams into reality.

The most prolific period of pessimism comes at twenty-one, or thereabouts, when the first attempt is made to translate dreams into reality

The average child is an almost non-existent myth. To be normal one must be peculiar in some way or another.

The urge to gamble is so universal and its practice so pleasurable that I assume it must be evil.

In some respects the life of a censor is more exhilarating that of an emperor. The best the emperor can do is to snip off the heads of men and women, who are mere mortals. The censor can decapitate ideas which but for him might have lived forever.

A cat is nobody's fool.