47 Quotes by James Acaster
- Author James Acaster
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I used to work with autistic children, and they said a lot of funny things to me.
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- Author James Acaster
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What if every relationship you've ever been in, is someone slowly figuring out they didn't like you as much as they hoped they would?
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- Author James Acaster
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If you just focus on getting better, and not being the best, you have such a good time.
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- Author James Acaster
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People like abstract art because it makes them feel clever.
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- Author James Acaster
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I got left for Mr. Bean. I found out a year after we split up. I opened the newspaper and there was a full-page story. No one else in the history of time has ever been left for Mr. Bean.
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- Author James Acaster
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First I stopped believing in hell, then the afterlife. Sometimes that connection is still there, and I'll feel an impulse to pray if I'm stressed or upset.
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- Author James Acaster
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I left school and didn't go to university to be in a band.
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- Author James Acaster
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And that, ladies and gentlemen, sums up the Fringe. Spend a year spitting your guts out writing a show, and people forget your name as soon as they walk out.
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- Author James Acaster
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Everyone was wearing jeans, so I started wearing slacks. I'd walk on, and people would laugh before I got to the mic because I looked stupid.
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