227 Quotes by Janeane Garofalo

All roads lead to my dogs, don’t they?

Granted, not really a joke, but how often do you get a mic in your hand? You know? So. I am sorry but don’t anybody trip on my soap box on the way out. Don’t anybody trip over that. And the chip on my shoulder’s a little heavy. I have back problems now.

I truly believe a woman’s weight is a political issue, and if one young woman out there can see me and not feel crummy about herself, that’s a good thing.

When I see guys in bars wearing the real fitted kind of Calvin Klein v-neck t-shirts I just want to go up to them and be like, ‘Oh, do you work out? Your tricep looks so great – thank you.’

Irrational crushes, infatuations, or obsessions. Whatever you want to label it, it’s important to reach out to others.

If you aren’t overly effusive or really nicey-nice with the press, you get a reputation for being outspoken or difficult.

I’m not a disciplined writer.

I’m grateful for any opportunity to act.

I don’t know that I would need to be famous as a Middle East policy expert to see that unilateral imperialism is bad policy.