227 Quotes by Janeane Garofalo

The reason a person is a republican is because something is wrong with them. Again, that’s science – that’s neuroscience. You cannot be well adjusted, open-minded, pluralistic, enlightened and be a republican.

He said that faith is like a glass of water. When you’re young, the glass is small, and it’s easy to fill up. But the older you get, the bigger the glass gets, and the same amount of liquid doesn’t fill it anymore. Periodically, the glass has to be refilled.

No no no! Don’t clap! No no no, you make me seem like I’m like a prophet or something and I’m so not!

I hate high fashion. I hate that we reward people for being genetic freaks. You hear the guys announcing the runway shows saying, ‘A pretty face is your best asset this season.’ And what? Ugly girls had a free ride last year?

I mostly get takeout, I have to admit – I don’t know if that’s something to be ashamed of. I’m not much of a cook.

You can’t have cinema by committee if you’re trying to do it well.

Taking into account the public’s regrettable lack of taste, it is incumbent upon you not to fit in.

Anybody who French bashes just might as well wear a badge that says ‘I am a follower! I don’t think for myself and I have no idea what I’m talking about.’ That would be a French basher.

You just need an opportunity and then you yourself have to do a good job, and then you hope that people go, ‘Oh yeah, I forgot about her.’