562 Quotes by Jarod Kintz

I want to understand the elements that compose courage in the same way I understand the periodic table. I feel that by knowing the periodic table of courage I can be courageous, at least periodically.

The only drink I like ice in is water, because you can’t water down water. I’m like that with love, too. Don’t you dare add any ice to the hot liquid loving I’m trying to pour all over you.

I’d race my motorcycle across the ocean just to avoid swimming in the desert. Ladies, I hope this indicates what kind of lover I’d make.

I applied for your love like a recent MBA grad might apply at Walmart today. I grew a beard on my chest and laughed through my ass just to get your attention.

Don’t try to hog loneliness and keep it all to yourself. Share it with a special someone.

I was nervous. Like an ice cube, I just froze up. Then I melted in some strange guy’s drink.

I am innocent! But only because the opportunity to partake in an activity that would render me guilty has not presented itself.

I’ve got a lot of love to give. Did I say give? I meant to say sell.

I wrote a thesis on love, and I wrote it in lipstick. Of course, I also got blood on the paper, because the lipstick was still attached to her cheating lips.