169 Quotes by Jeff Kinney

When you’re used to having electricity and then all of a sudden it’s taken away, you’re basically just one step from being a wild animal.

I didn’t really know what to expect from detention but when I waked into the room, the first thought I had was, I don’t belong in here with these future criminals.

Once people know you’re a CHEATER it follows you wherever you go.

I probably should’ve thought about talking to Uncle Gary a lot earlier. He’s been married something like four times already, so he’s an EXPERT on relationships.

I don’t know if this makes me a bad person or whatever, but it’s hard for me to get interested in other people’s vacations.

I started worrying that maybe you only get a certain number of prayers answered in you lifetime and I’m burning through mine too fast. I’d hate to find out later on that I used up all my chits, because I’ve been acting like I’ve got an unlimited supply.

Now there’s a black market for toys at our school. Christopher Stangel brought in a bunch of Legos from home yesterday, and I hear a single brick will set you back fifty cents.