278 Quotes by Jerome K. Jerome

There is this advantage about German beer: it does not make a man drunk as the word drunk is understood in England. There is nothing objectionable about him; he is simply tired. He does not want to talk; he wants to be let alone, to go to sleep; it does not matter where— anywhere.

He told us that it had been a fine day to-day, and we told him that it had been a fine day yesterday, and then we all told each other that we thought it would be a fine day to-morrow; and George said the crops seemed to be coming up nicely.

If he were a man of strong mind, it only gave him fits; but a person of mere average intellect it usually sent mad.

It is in our faults and failings, not in our virtues, that we touch one another and find sympathy. We differ widely enough in our nobler qualities. It is in our follies that we are at one.

But who wants to be foretold the weather? It is bad enough when it comes, without our having the misery of knowing about it beforehand.

What the eye does not see, the stomach does not get upset over

It is so pleasant to come across people more stupid than ourselves. We love them at once for being so.

I don't understand German myself. I learned it at school, but forgot every word of it two years after I had left, and have felt much better ever since.

Ne, kdepak, milé dámy, vy buďte vždy sentimentální a soucitné, jako jste dnes – buďte konejšivým máslem našemu suchému, okoralému chlebu.