141 Quotes by Jerry Lawler

When you were born and your mom saw your face and your rear end, she said "Oh! Siamesse Twins!"

Women! Can't live with 'em, no resale value.

When David killed Goliath, Mae Young called the cops.

It's almost like while you are working for the WWF everything is fine and good, but if you are no longer employed by them they want you to just drop off the face of the earth and it's like you never existed.

As a baby, Bret Hart was so ugly that they had to put tinted windows on his incubator!

When I'm in bed with a woman, my favorite move is a wrestling hold called the lip lock

When it comes to Shawn Michaels, there's always a way.

We've finally told the world that this is sports entertainment, and I think one of the best forms of entertainment is anything that's fun or funny, something that you really enjoy watching or listening to

We just did a show in Providence, Rhode Island, and we got three puppy shots before we even got on the air, which was great. Although sometimes you get flashed by some puppies that you'd rather not see. They're more like mongrels