48 Quotes by Joe E. Lewis

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my Scotch, I say I'm thirsty, not dirty.

A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on.

It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor - as long as you've got money.

Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people.

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants on.

I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them.

You are only young once, and if you work it right, once is enough.

If you want to make a dangerous man your friend, let him do you a favor.