368 Quotes by Karl Pilkington

What happens if someone else has my eyes, and they start looking at stuff I don’t like? I don’t like the idea of that.

Comedy’s really subjective, you know.

I’m a bit rubbish at knowing when something is good. But if it goes out and I can say, “I wasn’t as bad as I thought I would be”, then I’ll be happy. Until then, I’ll be thinking, “I shouldn’t be here!”

People always tell me I’m going to regret not having kids. But what if I have one and then I regret having it? Has anyone thought of that option?

I don't know what 'famous' is, really.

We should all love animals.

I don't want to go about offending people; that's not my plan.

I've never worried about life's big questions.