241 Quotes by Larry David

A date is an experience you have with another person that makes you appreciate being alone

Hitler really ruined that mustache for everybody. It’s really an interesting mustache, but now, no one can wear it.

Most practical jokes, I'll feel too bad for the other person so I'll stop just before the punchline.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

I'm Larry David. I happen to enjoy wearing women's panties.

I'm trying to elevate small-talk to medium talk.

Weathermen merely forecast rain to keep everyone else off the golf course

I've always loathed rich people, so I've become who I've loathed, which makes it doubly difficult, if you can follow me.

Pretty good. Pretttttttty, pretttttttttty, pretttttty good.