241 Quotes by Larry David

Trying on pants is one of the most humiliating things a man can suffer that doesn’t involve a woman.

The only change I can really see is that I don’t have to shop for pants in stores anymore.

There’s nothing that reflects me. I’m unreflectable!

I don’t like to analyze my music too much. It just comes welling up out of the depths of my soul.

I’m surprized Hitler didn’t round up the toupee people.

Sometimes you have to wander a bit, and do what you don’t want to in order to figure out what it is you’re supposed to do.

All of a sudden I discovered that I’m allergic to caviar. It was the perfect metaphor for my life. When I was only able to afford bad caviar, I could certainly eat my fill of it.

I don’t write shows with dialogue where actors have to memorize dialogue. I write the scenes where we know everything that’s going to happen. There’s an outline of about seven or eight pages, and then we improvise it.

Switzerland is a place where they don’t like to fight, so they get people to do their fighting for them while they ski and eat chocolate.