19 Quotes by Leah Marie Brown

Last week, Nathan left you at the altar. This week, you are a single woman honeymooning in the south of France. If that’s not reclaiming your power, I don’t know what is.

Serendipity works in crazy mysterious ways, doesn’t it? I thought I was going to die when Nathan broke our engagement, now here I am on my honeymoon falling in love with another man.

If I could have a quart of Haagan Dazs White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle administered to my veins via IV, I swear I would do it.

If a man can’t love you for who you are, he’s not worth The Dior Gloss.

By my fifth sip, I am sooooo glad I splurged thirty-five delicious Euros. That’s right math whizzes, the Red Beach set me back over fifty American dollars. Who cares if I have to eat Top Ramen when I get home? I’ll gladly pilfer condiment packages from fast food restaurants to survive if it means I get to sit in ZPlage and sip Red Beaches with anorexic Russian models and their playboy sugar daddies.

This isn’t going to be a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am. Luc’s a lover. He’s going to take it nice and slow. Make me ache for it.

I grossly miscalculated the trajectory of his hotness. He was fat, had three chins, and no neck. And he was bald. He looked like a giant toe.

Noodly: the act of being noodle-like, as in, Vivia drinks one Red Beach and she feels noodly.

My mother named me Vivia Perpetua because she believed naming me after some long-dead, mostly forgotten saint would motivate me to spend my life collecting unused eyeglasses for the blind or doling out mosquito netting to malaria-plagued Africans. Not that there is anything wrong with those efforts, but please.” Vivia in Faking It.