370 Quotes by Lewis Black

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

Everybody's family has different values.

I believe that summer is our time, a time for the people, and that no politician should be allowed to speak to us during the summer. They can start talking again after Labor Day.

The last person to get across that town in under three hours was yelling "The British are coming! The British are coming!"

I'm a happy person but an angry citizen.

It's amazing what I could've written in my life if I had realized that I should keep writing and not masturbating.

A father and two sons run Adelphia. It's a cable company. And they took from that company a billion dollars. A billion. Three people - three people took a billion dollars. What were they gonna do, start their own space program? 'Let's send the monkey to Mars, Dad!'

Earth Day was created because we were doing a lot of drugs, more drugs than you could ever

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.