11 Quotes by Marissa Baker

As perfectionists and idealists, INFJs are constantly striving to make things better. Whether it’s a relationship we’re invested in, a person we care about, a project we’re working on, or even a houseplant, INFJs won’t give up until they’ve exhausted every possibility for improvement.

INFJs are often accused of pushing people away, even though we long for deep relationships with others.

I find myself taking responsibility for everyone’s emotions, even though they are not my burden to carry. I somehow feel that it is up to me to make them happy, because no one else will. If my loved ones are not happy, neither am I.

This deep appreciation for what other people feel leads to INFJs being very conscious of what is or is not acceptable socially. INFJs are always trying to please others and act in a way that is acceptable in others’ eyes. This is in conflict with our very distinctive expression of Ni and we often end up in a struggle to be individualistic and fit in at the same time.

We love talking with someone who is interested in pealing back psychological and emotional layers, both ours and theirs if we trust them enough. Even issues that tend to deeply polarize people are open for discussion with an INFJ. While we will have strong opinions on somethings, most of the time we just want to talk about different ideas.

It takes a long time for INFJs to calm-down after a confrontation, especially if there were raised voices or heated emotions involved. Conflict is overwhelming, so we need to give ourselves time and space to process a confrontation.

If we hesitate to answer when you ask us a question, we are NOT thinking of an excuse or making up lies; we are simply trying to find the words to describe what we are feeling. We don’t think in logic, we think in feelings and symbols – those are sometimes difficult to find words for.

Often we’ll stop paying attention to the world outside our minds and walk around in a Walter Mitty-like state that causes people who have no idea what’s going on to label us as “crazy.” It often takes a conscious effort to pull ourselves out of our own heads enough to interact with people in a normal fashion, especially if we’re dealing with small-talk rather than a conversation with depth. So.

Rather, we don’t really see the value of money unless we’re starkly reminded that we need it when there isn’t any to be had.