175 Quotes by Melissa McCarthy

Somebody ripped their pants open at my wedding, dipping my mother. My mother is not a lady who throws herself into a dip that often, so I don't think he thought she was really going to do it.

Some days, I want to be prim and proper, and others, I want to be in a band.

At some point in the past, it was decided that women in comedy are never supposed to be shown in an unflattering light. But in comedy, you need all of your tools to be funny.

There was a three-year chunk as a teen where I should have been tranquilized and put in a cage.

Do I sometimes hope I wake up in the morning and people are like, 'What's wrong with her? She looks emaciated.' Of course I would love that. I'm such a clothes whore, I would love the opportunity to be a hanger. But I think I'm more confident than I've ever felt in my life.

The average size of a woman is 14.

I wanted to be a drag queen so badly. I'll bet I still own more wigs than any drag queen - I love me a wig.

I've grown to love L.A., but it's the most socially awkward place. All these people have come there not to be something but to pretend to be someone trying to be someone.

I want to make each piece of clothing work 15 different ways.